From: Xaviera <xie@xavierahollander.com>
Subject: A survivor's story
Date: Thu, 20 Sep 2001 21:56:46 +0200
To: "G. Miskin" <gmiskin@arabia.com>
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Tuesday, September 18, 2001 10:17
Subject: A Survivor's Story

My name is Adam Mayblum. I am alive today. I am committing this to so I never forget. SO WE NEVER FORGET. I am sure that this is one of
 thousands of stories that will emerge over the next several days and
weeks.

I arrived as usual a little before 8am. My office was on the 87th floor of the World Trade Center, AKA: Tower 1, AKA: the North Tower. Most of my associates were in by 8:30m. We were standing around, joking around, eating breakfast, checking emails, and getting set for the day when the first plane hit just a few stories above us. I must stress that we did not know that it was a plane. The building lurched violently and shook as if it were an earthquake. People screamed. I watched out my window as the building seemed to move 10 to 20 feet in each direction. It rumbled and shook long enough for me to get my wits about myself and grab a co-worker and seek shelter under a doorway. Light fixtures and parts of the ceiling collapsed. The kitchen was destroyed. We were certain that it was a bomb. We looked out
the windows. Reams of paper were flying everywhere, like a ticker tape parade. I looked down at the street. I could see people in Battery Park City looking up. Smoke started billowing in through the holes in the ceiling. I believe that there were 13 of us.

We did not panic. I can only assume that we thought that the worst was over. The building was standing and we were shaken but alive. We checked the halls. The smoke was thick and white and did not smell like I imagined smoke should smell. Not like your BBQ or your fireplace or even a bonfire. The phones were working. My wife had taken our 9 month old for his check up. I called my nanny at home and told her to page my wife, tell her that a bomb went off, I was ok, and on my way out. I grabbed my laptop. Took off my tee shirt and ripped it into 3 pieces. Soaked it in water. Gave 2 pieces to my friends. Tied my piece around my face to act as an air
filter.

And we all started moving to the staircase. One of my dearest friends said that he was staying until the police or firemen came to get him. In the halls there were tiny fires and sparks. The ceiling had collapsed in the men's bathroom. It was gone along with anyone who may have been in there. We did not go in to look. We missed the staircase on the first run and had to

 double back. Once in the staircase we picked up fire extinguishers just
 in case. On the 85th floor a brave associate of mine and I headed back up
to our office to drag out my partner who stayed behind. There was no air,
just white smoke. We made the rounds through the office calling his name. No
response. He must have succumbed to the smoke. We left defeated in our
efforts and made our way back to the stairwell. We proceeded to the 78th
floor where we had to change over to a different stairwell. 78 is the main
junction to switch to the upper floors. I expected to see more people.
There were some 50 to 60 more. Not enough. Wires and fires all over the place.
Smoke too. A brave man was fighting a fire with the emergency hose. I
stopped with two friends to make sure that everyone from our office was
accounted for. We ushered them and confused people into the stairwell. In
retrospect, I recall seeing Harry, my head trader, doing the same several
yards behind me. I am only 35. I have known him for over 14 years. I
proceeded into the stairwell with 2 friends.

We were moving down very orderly in Stair Case A. very slowly.
No panic. At least not overt panic. My legs could not stop shaking. My
heart was pounding. Some nervous jokes and laughter. I made a crack about
ruining a brand new pair of Merrells. Even still, they were right, my feet felt
great. We all laughed. We checked our cell phones. Surprisingly, there was
very good signal, but the Sprint network was jammed. I heard that the
 Blackberry 2 way email devices worked perfectly. On the phones, 1 out of
10 dial attempts got through. I knew I could not reach my wife so I called my
 parents. I told them what happened and that we were all okay and on the
way down. Soon, my sister in law reached me. I told her we were fine and
moving down. I believe that was about the 65th floor. We were bored and nervous.
called my friend Angel in San Francisco. I knew he would be watching. He
was amazed I was on the phone. He told me to get out that there was another
 plane on its way. I did not know what he was talking about. By now the
 second plane had struck Tower 2. We were so deep into the middle of our
 building that we did not hear or feel anything. We had no idea what was
really going on. We kept making way for wounded to go down ahead of us.
Not many of them, just a few. No one seemed seriously wounded. Just some cuts
 and scrapes. Everyone cooperated. Everyone was a hero yesterday. No
 questions asked. I had co-workers in another office on the 67th floor. I
 tried dozens of times to get them on their cell phones or office lines. It
 was futile. Later I found that they were alive. One of the many miracles
 a day of tragedy.

On the 53rd floor we came across a very heavyset man sitting on
 the stairs. I asked if he needed help or was he just resting. He needed
 help. I knew I would have trouble carrying him because I have a very bad
 back. But my friend and I offered anyway. We told him he could lean on us.
 He hesitated, I don't know why. I said do you want to come or do you want
us to send help for you. He chose for help. I told him he was on the 53rd
floor in Stairwell A and that's what I would tell the rescue workers. He said
okay and we left.



 On the 44th floor my phone rang again. It was my parents. They
 were hysterical. I said relax, I'm fine. My father said get out, there is
 third plane coming. I still did not understand. I was kind of angry. What
did my parents think? Like I needed some other reason to get going? I
couldn 't move the thousand people in front of me any faster. I know they love
me, but no one inside understood what the situation really was. My parents
did.
 Starting around this floor the firemen, policemen, WTC K-9 units without
the dogs, anyone with a badge, started coming up as we were heading down. I
stopped a lot of them and told them about the man on 53 and my friend on
67 I later felt terrible about this. They headed up to find those people and
 met death instead.
 On the 33rd floor I spoke with a man who somehow knew most of the
 details. He said 2 small planes hit the building. Now we all started
talking about which terrorist group it was. Was it an internal organization or an
 external one? The overwhelming but uninformed opinion was Islamic
fanatics.

 Regardless, we now knew that it was not a bomb and there were potentially
more planes coming. We understood.
On the 3rd floor the lights went out and we heard & felt this rumbling coming towards us from above. I thought the staircase was collapsing upon itself. It was 10 am now and that was Tower 2 collapsing next door. We did not know that. Someone had a flashlight. We passed it forward and left the stairwell and headed down a dark and cramped corridor to an exit. We could not see at all. I recommended that everyone place a hand on the shoulder of the person in front of them and call out if they it an obstacle so others would know to avoid it. They did. It worked
perfectly.

We reached another stairwell and saw a female officer emerge soaking wet
and covered in soot. She said we could not go that way it was blocked. Go up
to 4 and use the other exit. Just as we started up she said it was ok to go
down instead. There was water everywhere. I called out for hands on
shoulders again and she said that was a great idea. She stayed behind
instructing people to do that. I do not know what happened to her.

We emerged into an enormous room. It was light but filled with
 smoke. I commented to a friend that it must be under construction. Then we
 realized where we were. It was the second floor. The one that overlooks
the lobby. We were ushered out into the courtyard, the one where the fountain
used to be. My first thought was of a TV movie I saw once about nuclear
winter and fallout. I could not understand where all of the debris came
 from. There was at least five inches of this gray pasty dusty drywall soot
 on the ground as well as a thickness of it in the air. Twisted steel and
 wires. I heard there were bodies and body parts as well, but I did not
look.
 It was bad enough. We hid under the remaining overhangs and moved out to
the street. We were told to keep walking towards Houston Street. The odd thing
 is that there were very few rescue workers around. Less than five. They
all must have been trapped under the debris when Tower 2 fell. We did not know
 that and could not understand where all of that debris came from. It was
 just my friend Kern and I now. We were hugging but sad. We felt certain
that most of our friends ahead of us died and we knew no one behind us.
We came upon a post office several blocks away. We stopped and
 looked up. Our building, exactly where our office is (was), was engulfed
in flamed and smoke. A postal worker said that Tower 2 had fallen down. I
looked again and sure enough it was gone. My heart was racing. We kept trying to
 call our families. I could not get in touch with my wife. Finally I got
 through to my parents. Relieved is not the word to explain their feelings.
 They got through to my wife, thank G-d and let her know I was alive. We
sat down. A girl on a bike offered us some water. Just as she took the cap off
her bottle we heard a rumble. We looked up and our building, Tower 1
 collapsed. I did not note the time but I am told it was 10:30am. We had
been out less than 15 minutes.

We were mourning our lost friends, particularly the one who
stayed in the office as we were now sure that he had perished. We started
walking towards Union Square. I was going to Beth Israel Medical Center to
be looked at. We stopped to hear the President speaking on the radio. My
phone rang. It was my wife. I think I fell to my knees crying when I heard
her voice. Then she told me the most incredible thing. My partner who had
stayed behind called her. He was alive and well. I guess we just lost him
in the commotion. We started jumping and hugging and shouting. I told my wife
 that my brother had arranged for a hotel in midtown. He can be very
 resourceful in that way. I told her I would call her from there. My
brother and I managed to get a gypsy cab to take us home to Westchester instead. I
cried my heart out holding my son, and then I held my wife sobbing, until I fell asleep.

As it turns out my partner, the one who I thought had stayed behind was behind us with Harry Ramos, our head trader. This is now second hand information. They came upon Victor, the heavyset man on the 53rd floor.
 They helped him. He could barely move. My partner bravely/stupidly tested
the elevator on the 52nd floor. He rode it down to the sky lobby on 44.The
doors opened, it was fine. He rode it back up and got Harry and Victor. I
 don't yet know if anyone else joined them. Once on 44 they made their way
 back into the stairwell. Someplace around the 39th to 36th floors they
heard the same rumble I felt on the 3rd floor. It was 10am and Tower 2 was
coming down. They had about 30 minutes to get out. Victor said he could no longer
move. They offered to have him lead on them. He said he couldn't do it. My
 partner hollered at him to sit on his butt and schooch down the steps. He
 said he was not capable of doing it. Harry told my partner to go ahead of
 them. Harry had once had a heart attack and was worried about this mans
 heart. It was his nature to be this way. He was/is one of the kindest
people I know. He would not leave a man behind. My partner went ahead and made it
 out. He said he was out maybe 10 minutes before the building came down.
this means that Harry had maybe 25 minutes to move Victor 36 floors.

 I guess they moved 1 floor every 1.5 minutes. Just a guess. This means
Harry walked around the 20th floor when the building collapsed. As of now 12 of 13
 people are accounted for. As of 6pm yesterday his wife had not heard from
 him. I fear that Harry is lost. However, a short while ago I heard that he
 may be alive. Apparently there is a web site with survivor names on it and
 his name appears there. Unfortunately, Ramos is not an uncommon name in
New York. Pray for him and all those like him.

 With regards to the firemen heading upstairs, I realize that they were
going up anyway. But, it hurts to know that I may have made them move quicker to
find my friend. Rationally, I know this is not true and that I am not the
responsible one. The responsible ones are in hiding somewhere on this
planet and damn them for making me feel like this. But they should know that they
failed in terrorizing us. We were calm. Those men and women that went up
 were heroes in the face of it all. They must have known what was going on
and they did their jobs. Ordinary people were heroes too. Today the images
that people around the world equate with power and democracy are gone but
"America" is not an image it is a concept. That concept is only
strengthened " by our pulling together as a team. If you want to kill us, leave us alone
because we will do it by ourselves. If you want to make us stronger,
attack and we unite. This is the ultimate failure of terrorism against The United
 States and the ultimate price we pay to be free, to decide where we want
to work, what we want to eat, and when & where we want to go on vacation. The
 very moment the first plane was hijacked, democracy won.



 Xaviera Hollander